Things That Are Bad To Do To Your Computer

In no particular order

• Allow cats to rub against the main air vents, causing a sickly build-up of hair, dander, and catiness.
• After allowing cats to deposit general catiness, fail to clean inside of computer for 8 weeks…
• …then crank up the resolution on your favorite graphics-intensive application (video editing is best; games work in a pinch); Play “Count the Crashes” while attempting to figure out why computer crashes.
• Through dog toy under desk, when the only path from dog’s current position to said dog toy is through a 6-inch opening made by your office chair and computer tower.
• Bonus points if dog is wider than 6-inches; guess what happens to a computer tower?
• Disconnect your computer from a VPN with multiple application-created connections to that VPN.
• Eat Cottage Inn, thin crust pizza over beloved keyboard.
• Remove portable hard drive from protective case with a) bare hands, b) ungrounded, c) on a cold, fall day, d) over carpet.